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Betrayal brings up a lot of emotions for me. When I put my trust in someone, I expect them to honor that trust. I don’t just throw my trust around like it’s nothing, and you probably don’t, either.
But even then, I have a hard time putting my trust in people who I don't know all that well. Perhaps you feel differently, but I don’t readily tell classmates or coworkers or gym buddies about my personal life or share secrets with them until I get to know them better.
When I can call someone a friend, then I know my secrets are safe with them. But when I’m betrayed by a friend, I feel a lot of emotions at once. I feel hurt that someone I thought cared about me could turn around and stab me in the back. I feel mad at myself for opening up to someone so easily (even if it wasn’t my fault and wasn’t as easy as I think). I feel lost because now I’ve lost someone I thought was my friend.
Going so long being able to open up to someone you cared about until one day you suddenly can’t really makes you treat the same situations differently. You can’t ask your best friend for help anymore or tell her about a secret you’ve been holding in forever.
Now you have to figure things out on your own until you can find another best friend. And let me tell you — replacing a best friend isn’t like replacing an old shirt with a hole in it; it’s more like replacing your favorite bra. You know, the one that makes your boobs look incredible and maybe even a size bigger in the right light. The one you’ve had for years, yet somehow still has more support than ever. The one that looks good under any top and feels like you’re not wearing a bra at all. Oh yeah, and the one that’s been discontinued for five years.
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One of the most hurtful things someone can ever do to you is break your trust. Whether it’s in friendship or in love, people need to trust one another in order to have a harmonious, sustaining relationship. That feeling of security and warmth simply cannot exist with deceit, disloyalty, or lies.
For some, they will practice blind faith and refuse to believe that they have been deceived. Even if there’s evidence to prove it, they will turn a blind eye because they can’t face the feelings that go with acceptance: the nagging doubt, the sleepless nights, and crippling loneliness.
Then there are those who become suspicious of everything, and everyone. For these people, they have experienced enough betrayal to never fully trust anyone again. They’re always hyper vigilant, alert to the prospect that their friend or coworker could be cheating on them, or talking behind their back.
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